So I went to my first Khmer wedding. I didn’t actually go to the wedding ceremony part but from what I’ve heard it’s not that exciting. You just wait around while the bride and groom change outfits 20 times while performing various small pieces of the ceremony. But I went to the reception part. I was seated at a table full of people I did not know and proceeded to not talk to the people at all for the entire duration of the 6 course dinner. The guy who was sitting next to me though did talk to me to find out if I spoke Khmer and then I told him I was a teacher here and he knew I worked for Peace Corps. He actually works for the Provincial Office of Education, Youth, and Sports (POEYS) in Takeo so he works where we did training. We would go to the POEYS every week during training and he knew my training village and one of the people who was our lead Khmer teacher. Small world. Anyway, we ate a delicious meal which was served in about 6 courses and all of which were amazing. The Khmer people laughed at me when I used chopsticks though because I guess they think foreigners are incapable of using them but I proved them wrong by masterfully using them throughout the meal (except for one time when I was trying to pick up something round and it just wasn’t working so I stabbed it with one of the chopsticks and ate it…they got a kick out of that). After the meal, everyone at my table got up and left. So my host dad, who finally acknowledged that I was there, brought me over and sat me with some women. They were awesome. They treated me like I was an idiot and didn’t know how to do anything which is perfect. I need some people taking care of me and making sure I’m doing things right. They were leading me around telling me what I should be doing and it reminded me of my training mom which was nice. My new host family leaves me pretty much alone and thinks I can do everything on my own which is good in some respects but I like it better when they help me so I can make sure I’m doing things right and not making an idiot of myself. I guess I’ve never really been without a mom. During my senior year of high school I didn’t live with my real mom but I lived with my friend’s family and her mom treated me like one of her children so I had a mom then. When I went to college my mom lived 20 minutes away so I had her whenever I needed her. During training my mom treated me like one of her children and loved me like one of her children so I had that, but now my new mom is only 28 so she’s not really a mom to me and, like I said before, they leave me alone for the most part. So I no longer have a mom. I guess I need to grow up and be a big kid now but I’m only 20. I feel like I’m entitled to a little bit more mommy time. Oh well, back to the wedding story. The best part is coming up so don’t stop reading. We threw flowers at the bride and her father as they walked down and aisle. Well, I threw flowers, most people pelted the flowers full force into the bride’s face. I guess they thought it was funny but it was like this poor bride was running the gauntlet. She was being attacked with these flowers. Anyway, we did that and then the bride and groom walked around a table with fruit a few times and then they fed fruit to the bride’s parents and then fed fruit to the groom’s parents and then fed fruit to each other, hugged, and then kissed on the cheek. All the while, the women who my dad sat me with had left and they were replaced by this super creepy guy that teaches at the same school I teach at. He had talked to me before but tonight he decided he was going to follow me around the rest of the night. So I went back to sit near my host dad and he sat with me and he was telling me things like “You are dressed like a Cambodian woman tonight. I’ve never seen a foreigner wear Khmer clothes like you do. You look like a real Cambodian girl…but prettier”. So this is when he started getting uber creepy. He put his hand on my leg which is really uncommon and forward for a Khmer person. Girls and boys should not touch at all and even handshakes can be a little too much physical contact between a girl and a guy. However, on a side note, touching within the same sex is completely ok. The boys here touch all over each other. I look at them and think they are all gay because they all wear super tight pants and glittery flowery shirts. But that’s just the way the guys here dress and act. The girls are a little touchy feely, especially older women touching me which I have addressed in a previous post. But not to the extent that the boys touch each other. Ok, so back to my story, this guy was being really creepy and then he asked me to dance and everyone around me told me I should go do it so I did. It was really easy to get the hang of dancing. The music is awful and the dances are repetitive and boring but it was fun nonetheless. Everyone just dances in a circle so I wasn’t one on one with the creepy guy…until the song changed. Then I was facing him dancing and it was super weird. While we were dancing around the fruit table he picked up a pumpkin and told me that the pumpkin represents the king. I just nodded and smiled. Then he pointed to the eggplant and asked if I knew what that represents. I didn’t know but I knew that I didn’t want to know. I apologize in advance for the language I’m about to use but he leaned in and whispered “It means a dick”. That would be out of line for anyone to say to someone they hardly know but it’s even worse in this culture. I don’t even know this guy’s name. So I stopped dancing with him as soon as I could and just then my dad was leaving so I had a nice out. My tuk tuk driver was sitting outside for me (this guy is so awesome, I might post about him later) and I got in and went home. I called my friend immediately to tell him about the craziness and while I was on the phone talking about the creepy guy guess who rides up next to my tuk tuk and starts trying to talk to me while we’re moving…that’s right…the creepy guy. Then he finally drove off and said goodnight. Crazy wedding night.
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